CAINEv2

Oh yeah, if you haven't done so already you have until June 10th to get Darkrai for BW via wi-fi.
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Why isn't this real?


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Keldeo available at Gamestop starting August 27

Sweet! After this only 2 more Pokemon to complete my collection once again.
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I found this Pokemon-related forum game over at Gfaqs, and since we are anticipating Black 2 and White 2, it might be fun to do this while we wait. Though, perhaps I just wanted to show off what a shit-tier Pokemon I'd be. Credit goes to Gfaqs user Meta289.

1. Take your birthday, and add the month and the day together, then divide by 2. If necessary, round to the nearest whole number. The number you get is your Primary type. If your number is greater than 17, then subtract 17 from your number. The new number is your primary type.

1. Normal
2. Flying
3. Ground
4. Grass
5. Bug
6. Fighting
7. Dragon
8. Water
9. Ice
10. Ghost
11. Fire
12. Dark
13. Psychic
14. Electric
15. Steel
16. Rock
17. Poison

2. For your secondary type, take your birthday and subtract the day from the month, then divide by 2. Pretend that all negative numbers are positive. If your number is 0, then you get to pick your secondary type.

3. Abilities. Go to: http://www.random.org/ and generate a number between 1 and 164.
Now go to http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Ability and sort the list of abilities into numerical order by clicking the # sign at the upper left corner of the list. Your random number is your ability.

4. Time for base stats. Generate six numbers between 40 and 130.
1st number: HP
2nd number: Attack
3rd number: Defense
4th number: Special Attack
5th number: Special Defense
6th number: Speed

5. Movesets. Generate four numbers between 1 and 559. Go to http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/List_of_moves and look for your numbers. Those are your moves.

So, I'm a Ghost/Bug with Slow Start. Wow. That is the shittiest ability ever. ATK and SPD halved for five turns at the start of battle. Never mind that, though, because:

My stats:
HP 77
Attack: 62
Defense: 40
Special Attack: 60
Special Defense: 114
Speed: 90

I don't have any decent stats save for special defense. I maybe could stall against a Psychic-type, but that's it. Checking out my moves:

392-Aqua Ring
287-Refresh
284-Eruption
231-Iron Tail

Refresh? On a Ghost-type? Are you fucking kidding me? At least Aqua Ring might help me stall, but it doesn't matter because I will likely be KO'd in the first turn by a physical attacker because of my piss-poor defense. And my opponent will go first, because of Slow Start and my mediocre speed. Eruption and Iron Tail aren't so bad, a shame I don't have high values in either attack stat to use them. No STAB makes me an especially sad panda. Slow Start? Did my mom get it on with a Regigigas? HOW?

Please, someone roll better than I did.


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TA~RU!

I don't even...

So, I rolled Grass/Fire for my type. Pretty cool, I don't think there are any Pokemon with that type combination. So I'm exotic.

Ability roll is 90: Poison Heal. Not ideal, but at least I can't get hit with Toxic. That's pretty cool.

Stat rolls:

97 HP
89 ATK
127 DEF
47 SP. ATK
57 SP. DEF
122 SPD

Really good Defense and Speed? That's kind of unusual. Shit-tier Special. Use me like a faster Steelix, I guess? Is Steelix even good?

Move rolls:

419: Avalanche
413: Brave Bird
35: Wrap
74: Growth

Cool Growth, bro, what with my shitty Special stats and complete lack of Special attacks. Gonna have to use a TM to get rid of that. Wrap isn't awful... What the hell is Avalanche doing there? Brave Bird is an undeniably awesome attack, though my ATK isn't high enough to really utilize it.

So there are elements of coolness here, but probably not enough to make me more than mid-tier. Mostly I wonder... what the hell do I look like? I'm a Grass/Fire type with an Ice move; I'm also clearly some kind of bird. This makes no goddamn sense.
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Literacy is the best tech.

I'm Steel/Psychic with Weak Armor (born 2/28), which means... I have no idea.  Okay defensive typing, I guess, but Weak Armor is for sweepers, right?

Stats:
HP: 118
ATK: 93
DEF: 71
S.ATK: 72
S.DEF: 97
SPD: 80

Dunno what to make of those.  Mostly average, only really good stat is HP.  Looks like a starter that nobody picks. 

Moves:
Ice Fang
Gastro Acid
Defend Order
Strength

Well, damn.  Defend Order is pretty good, but everything else is okay to blah, no STAB moves and my best offense is Strength.  I am the weirdest tank Pokemon ever. 
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Abandon all hope, ye short of attention span

I'm Dark/Fighting (6/17) with Liquid Ooze.  No idea about any of that.

Stats:
HP: 129
ATK: 85
DEF: 76
S. ATK: 82
S. DEF: 70
SPD: 45

Oh joy, I'm slow, no real defense or attack, and have a decent amount of HP.

Moveset:
Psychic
Gear Grind
Haze
Stun Spore

Well, Psychic is good, I guess, no idea about the others, though I assume Stun Spore is an instant paralyze.

Im a Grass/flying with special move Pick up

Stats:
HP 127
Attack 129
Defense 120
Special attack109
Special Defense53
speed 44

Moveset:
307  Blast Burn
40   Poison Sting
511  Quash
144  Transform

it looks like pretty decent stats, but I dont know squat about pokemon

Stephen is the best Pokemon so far. I'd keep a Stephen on my adventure party... gotta be a better choice than Zigzagoon. Pick Up, fuck yeah.
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Literacy is the best tech.

Agreed that Pick Up on a non-Normal type is pretty beast, especially at higher levels. The double-weakness to Ice is pretty nasty, though.

I really like Mr. Universe's typing. Dark/Fighting is an interesting mix.

So is Grass/Fire, for that matter. I'd love to see such nonsensical type pairings in future Pokemon. One user on that Gamefaqs thread was Fire/Ice. WTF. Anything but another Fire/Fighting, or Normal/Flying.

So, I'm thinking that I'm a maggot Pokemon, miki_sei is a flaming menthol-infused joint with wings, Monsoon is something that resembles Krang from TMNT, whose metal body has an ice bite and can throw up somehow(?), Mr. Universe is essentially a slimy, lazy Cobra Kai student with weak psychic powers, a penchant for machinery, and weird knack for returning everything to the status quo (not that he would, being all evil and whatnot) and Stephen is a falling poison ivy leaf that can shape-shift, slow you down, and set things on fire.

Interestingly enough, Stephen's moveset reminds me of the abilities of your average internet troll...flaming, creating a new user account (maybe on a different IP address) to respond to bans, quashing meaningful discussion, and poisoning the mood of everyone on the goddamn board. That's pretty weird...

So yeah, Stephen wins so far...
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TA~RU!

>>29841

Also, come on Will. You don't remember Stun Spore? Seriously!? Haven't you ever raised a Butterfree before? Hell, Oddish knows that move from the get-go! These are Gen 1 Pokemon, bro. No excuse.
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Literacy is the best tech.

Ice/Water

Ability
125 Sheer Force

HP 105
Attack 121
Defense 106
Special Attack 72
Special Defense 47
Speed 130

Moves
319 Metal Sound
61 BubbleBeam
332 Aerial Ace
502 Ally Switch

I can't see myself as anything but a physical sweeper given my high attack, insane speed, and ability so maybe use me like some super speedy Gyarados or some crap? Of course something like a simple Thuderbolt would probably OHKO me easy and the fighting weakness isn't doing me any favors. Unfortunately my moveset is underwhelming but could be remedied with some TM/HM/move tutor moves like Waterfall which would be pretty strong with STAB + Sheer Force.

Since we don't have any visuals I'm gonna say I am some kind of ice squid. My beak and tentacles bring the power while my jet propulsion gives me crazy speed. Bubblebeam is self explanatory. Metal Sound can come from the biting of my beak while Aerial Ace can be me flying into the air using jet power. And since I'm making stuff up anyway I'm sure my learnset would include bite and punch based moves so stuff like elemental punches/fangs would be pretty cool. I'm also certain I would learn at least one priority move. Things could get dumb real fast with a buffing move and/or Baton Pass. Of course I also need learn moves like smokescreen and wrap to make use of all my squidiness.

I thought about this too much to make myself sound cooler orz. Would use me in my party.
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Electric/Bug
Ability: Reckless

Stats:
HP - 67
Attack - 92
Defense - 121
Special Attack - 86
Special Defense - 73
Speed - 60

Moves:
Bubble
Counter
Avalanche
Gunk Shot

What a weird pokemon.  My only great stat is defense, while my attack and special attack are decent as well.  My move set seems sort of strange to me, though.
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Becoming less of a lurker...

Fighting/Ground

Ability:
1 Stench

Stats:
HP 46
Attack 98
Defense 100
Special Attack 116
Special Defense 121
Speed 105

Moveset
413 Brave Bird
510 Incinerate
418 Bullet Punch
336 Howl

Original post by Stephen
it looks like pretty decent stats, but I dont know squat about pokemon

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"Even if you forget the seatbelt in your car, don't forget the seatbelt of your heart!"

Original post by miki_sei
>>29841

Also, come on Will. You don't remember Stun Spore? Seriously!? Haven't you ever raised a Butterfree before? Hell, Oddish knows that move from the get-go! These are Gen 1 Pokemon, bro. No excuse.

Actually, no, I never used either Butterfree or Oddish....  I mostly remember Sleep Spore on Parasect for Abra farming.